Saturday, May 04, 2024

the filipino mail order MAiD

​i put this description down of the filipino male in canada his mannerisms and inner reasoning and i cant stop laughing about how accurate it was. 

it went like this:

you know how the filipino guy a lot of times when arriving somewhere to meet. you looks kinda guilty sometimes and acts shady and short is because he just came from doing a bahala na and frenched tf out. now i didnt say it like that but its on my twitter and i cant remember per vatim but it went something like that. 

now i cant even remember if i put it down on twitter or just said it aloud to myself which i do all the time and miss writing these gems down…

tweet tweet goes nicole haha 

there are times long passages of thought on the social groups and the characters within them, their arcs in relation to mine, and how we intermingle in these developed or sometimes loosely associated circles of unique individuals and circumstances. Most times its easy to say it aloud but I only remember by hearing it and miss the inner thought which was far more complex and dramatic haha. Indeed life is tricky to navigate and navigate left handed did I try. Most days I would have enough problems with a pair of scissors alone but these days its just flexing statistics on a casino crash game or slotting on beatduel. Actually thats not a bad idea. They could charge like five cents a song and every new song comes out like .50 then drops a week or month later but plays in the battles im gonna email them like for newbs they got to pay for their collection or weekly access or ads per song…. haha i hate ads there is no policing in the other categories and those apps that target ad me because of my online spending run illegal ads in different categories….like casual app or game app but its a casino app w payment processing and no canadian certified verification method for minors and people in other countries using vpns where its illegal in their country or area to make bets period. like my region now in toronto somehow with my combination of wifi and cellular connection my geophysical location somehow doesnt matter and i become in the jurisdiction of delaware i think it is because of how hamilton spans across the lake on the east side its really beyond my full comprehension plus i have to router or port through manchester and pennsylvania which still fails my understanding of province state lakes locations places lands and cities throughout time. what does it even mean? i already forgot but it went something like i figured it out through understanding that i was getting baited by rogers to enter my password for my wifi in a public address in order to change it and i refused because why and also wtf am i 14 years old i didnt want the rogers guys to use my wifi but someone did anyway that time anyway i had to enter it somewhere so i checked their security certificates and they were on those platforms sure enough two separate certificates one for pennsylvania and one for manchester and i looked them up on the map and found britain and england and shit and i was like wtf these look like the cordilleras but leveled on the tops where the cities and towns are. and then the maps i took hundreds of screenshots of them i really should post them up they are sludge to go through without a single note on any of them but i took the screenshot of the satellite image i found and out together by search only god knows if these places are linked geophysically because some of these screenshots are out of this world hahaahah scale my dear, scale…. anyway i am hungry and will make food now…. i have brocoli and rice and peanut butter because i bought this huge ginisang bagoong thats great out of bottle who would forgive me if i started cooking with bagoong here no one no doubt. hmm neighbour just came to grab weed what a bother haha oh well i guess no one else would know if i was alive or dead now wouldnt they yes indeed that no one would surely miss my rambling.

Thursday, April 18, 2024

i looked at everyone, all the time

​everywhere i go im always looking at everyone thinking if only i can see one more face, it might be his.







Friday, April 12, 2024

memes

































viral things to go on trend 24/7 fleeking the fads and bitcoining the COVIDs:

1. salvation stories out of depravity

2. diets 

3. fiats

4. nursery and school yard rhymes 

5. maps 

6. languages

7. predictability models

10. metals

11. electricity

12. if you journeyed in a vessel, what would you be living in? a dwelling? a home? an apartment? probably apartment right? anyway those things maybe they were called houses as my number 12 in this list of ​viral things to go on trend 24/7 fleeking the fads and bitcoining the COVIDs. Personally I think we need a new word for the physical structure apartment but an older term that may not LODGING nope i mean we need a new common term describing the physical structure of the apartment you live in that is social housing but in medieval times that may or may not have already morphed into a new word. Beyond renting or living, the name of the type of building. Co-op building but not building. Do you know this term? A new term for chassis that is more specific pointedly to the formation of a social class of renters that do not pay rent to a single landlord but rather to a common pool of resource for future developments. What is this structure called? I dont think theres a word Im looking for it. It will define our middle class here in Canada.

Monday, April 08, 2024

full solar eclipse

​im so glad my window faces the sun. too bad it is cloudy today, the day of the eclipse. i guess no one turned the air circulator satellites on last night. it sucks actually hmmm how can we collectively move these clouds so that we may all see the solar eclipse today…. i wonder.




14:31 - i cant believe the moon is covering the sun right now i can see it through the clouds and the sun is starting to look like the moon smiling… the sun light seems different too even through the clouds. thats how sensitive we must be. last partial eclipse i was also out in east york somewhere actually i remember it very clearly there was a nice lady who passed me and we greeted each other and chatted about the eclipse for a bit because we both didnt know there was a partial eclipse happening that day. it must have been over a decade ago i was living in parkdale but i was up from the danny that day somewhere.


lame

​well i just started a new drawing after not finishing the last one because i dont like the colour scheme.

looking for a rabbit i heard they collect books. that man on the bus looks like one- a ravbit i mean. also he would be great to discuss colour pallets with because his was incredible while i was in all faded black that day. im super disheartened actually and practically listless. my favorite match 3 game (blitz by esport newco) thinks im a piece of shit for deleting my account now i feel demonized by their fraud prevention and payment processor software. then i lost ten bucks on flyX but only after winning 20 of course. then also im stuck on the same candy crush level for days now since im boycotting oaying for gold bars. im going to be broke this month because of my entertainment budget over used by gaming online. ugh. ive become addicted to gambling small change all month its huge i hate it its taken over drug consumption and this worries me. am i changing? haha got cha. tomorrow or rather later is the eclipse and im excited. 

i kind of want to move i got too high too many times and made a total ass of my crazy self but i dont remember so i think the neighbours hate me theyre always spying on my they are spying on me right now even and its hella late. i want to move the people here are kind of duds and they also likely think im insane so they will never respect me or treat me humanely also theyre all foreigners so i feel mostly icky and preyed upon. 

anyway i dont actually care because i know for a fact im not doing anything to other people being in my apartment alone. 

thrned off my twitter theres just a void no feedback whatsoever so i feel robbed of the camaraderie i seek on social media. its only my reaching out. im unrelateable and ignorable so i just wont bother with it. might turn it on again later but its obviously not credited to me, any of my posts pics thoughts anything i retweet like its a huge void of not getting any feedback on something that you wanted to share with a like minded person. ill have to reactivate later when i feel better. no one says anything here on my blog either like i dont even know if peoole i know read this because they would never tell me and i also find that problematic. yeah online shit sucks for me after all that living on it. i never got anything back online or in real life. so im super tired and bored and not into sharing anymore of my life because it feels rapey. 

Sunday, April 07, 2024

mapping

I forgot to tell you about all of the mapping I’ve done I got sick of it and I’m not doing it anymore. Even my phones got hacked I think and used for the Maps. I’m not even kidding I’m just totally that actually is why I’m in a lump right now because I was doing that mapping with the navigational charts for water incorporated into my Google map when I was quite violently, and abruptly stopped by the police again for God knows what reason walking outside at night apparently anyway I did a lot of mapping and I have to try to describe what I did and how I did it and how it fixed the Google map that was pretty cool. I also have a bunch of screenshots I want to post cause they are really trippy and we’re probably never gonna see them again . 

some quilt.farm patterns i drew